Assumed Power

…Recognize that each person, including you, has the option to accept or reject power allocations.
Kathleen Kelley Reardon

Imagine being in a courtroom and having a lawyer badgering you and twisting your words. How intimidating! Cynthia found herself in court having to justify a school placement decision, but the lawyer wouldn’t let her speak. Cynthia looked at the judge and said she needed to take a break. Way to go Cynthia! It gave her a few minutes to gather her thoughts, compose herself and break the attorney’s stride. She took the power back.

Carolyn was on a business trip when her boss came to her hotel room after dinner and wanted to come in and continue discussing their work strategy. Carolyn was young, naïve and trusting so she let him in but it quickly became apparent that work was the last thing on his mind. Fortunately, she was able to reject his advances and made him leave. She wasn’t worried about her job and she took the power back,

Most of the time we assume people have much more power than they really do. And if we can just walk away (from a relationship, a job or any situation) they have no power at all. Don’t be a victim! Speak up, act or get outside support. You have the power to reject someone’s assumed power.

Money Saving Tip

saving moneyDon’t pay more for super soap. According to the Mayo Clinic, antibacterial soap is no more effective at killing germs than regular soap and continued use may weaken the the product’s effectiveness thereby making it harder to kill these germs in the future.

 

What made you smile today?

What made you proud of your money choices today?

Speak Up!

We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over.
Anthony Bierce

Have you ever choked on your opinion rather than share it? Are there things that make your blood boil yet you say or do nothing? Are you the great peacemaker at work or in your family at the price of getting your own needs met? Everyone needs to be comfortable having a voice—and then choosing when to use it. Do you have a voice?

Share your opinion and encourage people to share theirs so you can learn from each other. Speak up in situations where your opinion needs to be heard. I was in one situation where I should have voiced my opinion but kept quiet. Within a year my concerns were confirmed and I had to live with the fact that if I had had the gumption to speak up it may have helped to avoid some of the problems that occurred. Another time I spoke up and was very articulate in explaining my point of view, but then allowed myself to go along with the group to support someone about whom I had some serious doubts. Bad choice. Almost immediately I realized that my show of support was a definite breach of my own personal integrity. It has gone down on my list of lessons learned and will help to reinforce me to act differently if I’m in a similar position in the future. Can you identify the situations where you didn’t speak up although you had something to say?

Money Saving Tip

saving money An ounce of prevention can save you from having to call a plumber. Don’t brush your hair over the sink. Don’t pour grease down the drain. Once a month pour a kettle of boiling water down each sink to dislodge grease and soap scum before it hardens and clogs the drain.

 

What made you smile today?

What made you proud of your money choices today?

You Are Good Enough?

And above all things, never think that you’re not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning.
Isaac Asimov

How can the basic fear of “not being good enough” affect you financially? Here are examples of how four women subconsciously compensate for feeling inadequate:

  • Gwen buys expensive gifts and always treats others when she eats out; or she picks up tickets to an event and doesn’t let others reimburse her.  At some level she feels others will “owe” her for being generous and include her in other activities.
  • Kristy limits herself to the “right” stuff. Whether it’s the clothes she buys, the places she shops or who styles her hair, it has to be the best. Kristy won’t risk giving her husband’s family any excuse to judge her because she came from a less affluent background.
  • Paula takes on more and more work and responsibility but won’t initiate a conversation to ask for additional compensation or a new job title. She doesn’t see her value to the company and feels like she always has to prove herself.
  • Jill is an entrepreneur and used most of her start-up money to rent an expensive office in an elite location to impress her friends.  That meant she didn’t have enough money left to invest in the staff to get the work done and, as a result, her business failed.

The fear of not being good enough is unrelated to a person’s position, actual success or the amount of money one has. If you think you’re “not good enough,” how is it affecting your bottom line? Is it time for you to reassess and consider just how wonderful and capable you really are?

Money Saving Tip

saving moneyWant a bike when you’re on vacation? Sometimes you can find a used one cheaper at a thrift store or as a resale at a bike store than it would cost to rent one. And then you can donate it and claim a deduction.

 

What made you smile today?

What made you proud of your money choices today?

Is Life Passing You By?

I could not, at any age, be content to take my place by the fireside and simply look on. Life was meant to be lived. Curiosity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life.
Eleanor Roosevelt

After I came home after a quick laser repair of a small tear in my retina, I had no pain, but it took a few hours for the blurriness to go away. I couldn’t read, use the computer or do much else, so I did what many of us do when we have nothing better to do: I watched television. I often watch particular shows on TV but don’t recall the last time I just watched for hours on end. And while I was grateful to have something to just fill up the time, it was truly mind numbing. It made me think of how many times we feel we don’t have time to do important things yet we sit down in front of the TV and literally lose hours and hours of precious time.

Are you filling up your life with television or staying busy doing meaningless things? At the end of the day, week or month, do you feel empty or like life is just passing you by? Use some of your free time to get involved by giving to others, writing that article or book, starting to research the side business you’ve been thinking about, getting your finances in order, start playing the instrument you always wanted to play or planting the garden you’ve dreamt about for years.

The amazing thing is that when all you do is watch TV or stay mindlessly busy, it drains your energy. You’ll actually have more energy if you make yourself do something productive and enjoyable. What will that be? Keep it simple and just do it!

Money Saving Tip

saving moneyGetting a new oven? A convection oven cooks foods faster because it continually circulates heated air around the food. It can cook certain foods 20% faster, thereby saving on your energy costs.

 
 

What made you smile today?

What made you proud of your money choices today?

Giving and Self Concern

8-28dog boy ice creamThe most successful givers are those who rate high in concern for others but also in self-interest.
Grant

Giving is a fascinating and controversial topic. People who give successfully—whether that is giving money, things or personal support, provide the foundation to make a difference that can last. They care about the people they are giving to and they want to see that person get ahead. Some people give without any concern for how it will affect the other person. They simply like to give and help others even if it actually isn’t in the other person’s best interest.

So where does it fit that self-interest is also important? People who give and also consider their own self-interest are aware of how giving affects them personally. Some people give so much that they burn out or feel used and resentful. Others are motivated by giving and gain strength and energy from it without misusing the power that can come with being in the position to give.

How do you give? Do you consider how it will affect the other person? Do you consider how it will affect you personally?

Money Saving Tip

saving money Even if you are not a member, you can take advantage of getting your prescriptions filled at Sam’s Club and Costco at the discounted rate.

 

 
What made you smile today?

What made you proud of your money choices today?